How do you have sex without being in love? What is sex if it's not coupled with love? Is there love if you feel good when you are having sex? How do you let go of the thing you have promised yourself you wouldn't let go? How do you keep from creating a mess and staying happy?
If anyone knows the answers to these questions please help me. Because I am so confused right now. I was going along smooth as silk, happy as a clam, floating on a cloud. I hit a humongous brick wall! HUGE!!!
Now, I'm not happy anymore. I feel sick and scared. I don't want to give up the life I have now, and I don't think I want to continue to do the thing I have done. Life is so hard. Living the questions to discover the answers is terribly painful.
I am not ready to love. My heart is still broken. A broken heart can't love properly until it's healed. Why don't people understand this? How can I be pushed and pulled and not snap in two?
I need a vacation from my life. FiFi has it hard right now.
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